Posted by: cg00n | November 23, 2011

Cruising towards Christmas

The cruise was great!  No, we didn’t take A with us.  We let her semi-fend for herself with a little help from our friends.  Our time was very relaxing with good food and interesting places to visit.  As a total break from our normal “you won’t get me on one of those things” approach to excursions we took a rather fast-and-furious zip line tour of a tropical forest.  The only part I found worrying in general was the final approach to each platform.  I had visions of laminating myself to the tree trunk.  The whole experience was a good test of my state of mind.  Not so very long ago I would have been fighting down the anxiety and vertigo.  Getting through this whole trip with barely a murmur of dissent from my amygdala gives me great confidence that I am on the right mental track.

Physically I’m doing pretty well too, if you exclude the filthy cold I picked up on the way home.  The increased margin on the previous excision seems to have done the trick, so that one’s clear.  Two new lumps were already gestating before we left on the cruise but there was little point in panicking so I got them taken out right after we got back.  One of them was really close to my shin bone which makes getting a good margin difficult.  The stitches come out in about two weeks so I’ll probably get the pathology report then.

I am allowing myself a little hope that we might be getting ahead of the melanoma and that I may be lucky enough to beat it without a lot more intervention.  Apparently this does happen sometimes and all the activity since my isolated limb perfusion has been in my lower right leg which may be an indication that it is not spreading.  On the other hand this could be just a lull.  Sometimes melanoma will go dormant for up to a few years and then suddenly reappear.  Oh well, the hell with it.  I probably won’t die today.  It’s already 8pm.

News Roundup

In other good news I didn’t actually notice any bad news on the melanoma front except for this one.  Peace be upon him:  he put up a good fight.




  1. I seem to be doing better in the mood department. Can’t say I’ve reached to joy, but I hope that will come. Have no idea if menopause had anything to do with it or not–I actually croned a couple of years ago.

    Arthur’s new psychiatrist actually listens to him, and he’s undoing some of the harm the last one inflicted on him. Arthur was on a coktail that finally was working. Then we had to pay for Abilify out of pocket–very ouch–and I asked if Arthur could go off it and try lamotragine instead. L by itself didn’t help, and Arthur had noticed a sweet spot in the process of adding L and decreasing A, so we went back to that. This appt. he said he had been feeling down for the last several weeks, and wanted an adjustment. I can’t remember which of the three meds was increased a bit, but we hope for better. Until Shibata-san, he hadn’t had a time where he felt balanced and good about himself, save briefly. Since Arthur will be 18 at the end of January, I’d looked for someone who could handle the transition from child/adolescent to adult, so that he didn’t have to make an immediate switch next year.

    I am amazed at you going down a zip line (anyone, actually)–my vertigo and fear-of-falling-from-a-great-height prevents me from even considering it. Kurt’s pretty much the same way, although we differ a bit in what sets us off.

    I don’t get flu shots, btw, because I seem to be highly resistant to most cold&flu germs since Arthur went through building his immune system as a toddler. It’s my allergies that will bug me!

    Congratulations on the mood & physical health acheivements!

  2. Love the idea of the cruise and zip line tour of the forest. It must have been exciting even if at times somewhat terrifying. My biggest worry would be that I’m not as agile as I used to be. Leaving A at home to fend for herself (with the help of friends) must have given you a feeling of new freedom. At least that is how I would have felt. B isn’t well today (headache mostly) and for the first time I left him alone while I went in to work for a short meeting. I came home feeling as if I’d somehow crossed a major river on the parenting journey. First it is wonderful not to have to find a sitter or miss the meeting. Secondly I am pleased I’ve raised a child that can be home alone for a few hours without any major worry or concern on either of our parts. Perhaps you had some of the same feelings leaving A when you went on a holiday.

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